5 min read · May 17, 2021
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I have always loved Jim Carrey.
Whether it was the early 90s Jim Carrey, with his manic energy that translated into wiley roles (Ace Ventura, Dumb and Dumber) that stole scenes in every film. Whether it was the late 90s and early 2000s Jim Carrey that dove into complex human characters and brought a kind of relatablity that very few movie stars can bring (The Truman Show, Man on the Moon). Or whether it’s the Jim Carrey from then on, with his vary degrees of movies that come ever so often to charm, entertain — and occasionally deliver a profound message.
Yes Man is one of those movies.
Not to sound like a rote movie critic but here’s a quick summary:
Following his divorce, Carl develops a negative outlook towards life. He is socially withdrawn and just does enough to keep his bank job. He routinely turns down opportunities and events. But upon a suggestion from an old colleague, Carl attends a cult-like seminar that forces him to say ‘Yes!’ to every request and invitation.
Suddenly, his life begins to change. He starts to have fun, go on crazy adventures, learn new skills and eventually meet a girl he likes: a band singer named Allison. Together, they have even more adventures and begin to really like each other.
Though the bubble finally bursts when the couple are stopped at an airport, with FBI agents profiling Carl as a potential terrorist for his recent erratic behavior. This leads Carl to confess that he is under guidance of a cult leader who wants him to say Yes to everything. Allison, baffled by this, leaves Carl.
After a series of bizzarre events, Carl comes to his senses. He finds Allison and tells her about his insecurities and limitations, and they reconcile.
There are lot of lessons to be drawn from this particular movie.
This movie is about self-discovery and the unlimited possibilities that make life such a worthy adventure. It is about love and friendship — and the important roles that they play. But, I think, the movie’s crux is a little different.
The movie’s most pressing theme is choices: What we say Yes to and what we say No to.
Sure, Carl’s life dramatically changes when he says Yes to things that are outside of his comfort zone. But, as it turns out, Carl’s life also becomes really chaotic due to the fact that he says Yes to too many things.
And the reverse is also true.
Constantly shunning new avenues of experience and opportunity is precisely the reason Carl’s life needs a drastic shake-up in the first place. Although, Carl’s journey to self-discovery would have gone a lot smoother if he had checked himself once in a while. You know, said a No here and there.
So, balance is definitely key when it comes to our choices. Because no matter how much we try, we will miss opportunities. And at the same time, to exist only in our comfort zone is equivalent to eating the same flavour of ice-cream over and over again.
How, then, should we make our choices? Both small and big.
Approaching things with curiosity, not caution.
Too often when we encounter something new, we tend to become tentative. And when that happens, we are more likely to pass on it.
The message here is not to say Yes to everything like Carl did but to approach things — especially new things — with a sense of curiosity. We can ask ourselves the following questions:
How does this hold up with regards to my experience?
Why am I drawn to it?
Why am I repelled by it?
If I try it, what’s the worst that can happen?
By constantly being curious about things and people, we are far less likely to be in a rut. And if we don’t get stuck in a rut, we are far less likely to do something dramatic and overcompensate when life boxes us in.
Appreciating Width AND Depth.
If the story of Carl teaches us anything it is that we need to be open; life is too colourful to be stuck in a monotonic cycle for a long time — no matter how much life has beaten us down.
But while it is important to appreciate and accept the new, it is equally important to hold on to things (and people) that matter to us the most. Things that give us deep joy. Things that give our lives true meaning.
And if in that pursuit, we have to ocassionally say No to the new and interesting, so be it. Because preserving what we truly hold dear is just as important as casting a wide net.
Planting at least one foot on the ground.
In our complex world, it is rare to find someone who is truly grounded — in who they are, where they come from, what they do. There are so few people who are like that, with both of their feet firmly planted on the ground.
It’s rare because it’s near impossible.
Humans are driven by passions and imagination. We carry a brain that has a potential to solve complex and wonderful problems; a brain that can also be a big source of misery for us and our loved ones. Add to that the multiplicity of options all of us have and a disruptive streak that we naturally possess. It can all be a big burden.
So, why not follow the one-foot-on-the-ground-at-all-times policy?
This approach can provide us a much-needed anchor while giving us enough room to create, imagine and discover. After all, life’s purpose is not exactly being shackled down to our desks and dead-end jobs like Carl.
And finally…
A quote. Said not by Carl but his love-interest Allison, a naturally free-spirited person.
The world’s a playground. You know that when you are a kid, but somewhere along the way everyone forgets it.
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